Friday, July 23, 2010

The Full Picture

Jedd took this picture of me last week. I wonder if it shows equal parts contentment and "I need a nap and/or shower". :)

I think most of us tend to blog about the happiest times, the joyful celebrations, the picture-perfect days. I know I feel more motivated to document such days and events. But I've also been thinking about the picture I've painted of our lives on my blog and I think I would do myself, as well as others, perhaps most of all my girls if they choose to be moms one day, a favor if I shared a few of the frustrations or challenges that are also part of our daily lives. Maybe I'm better at sharing the ins and outs than I think but I recognize that yesterday's post looks idyllic, and truthfully, it was one of those days! But here is a little more of the fullness of our lives:

Although we live in a gorgeous place with mountains, lakes, wildlife, big sky, etc. we are far from our loved ones. We miss our MN community and I miss my mom especially. Perhaps as we anticipate having a third child, I feel the pull even more. I know my parents would love to help us out and the thought of dropping off the girls for a night sounds dreamy. In addition, the camp season is in full swing during the most beautiful months here in Montana which means Jedd works six long days a week which greatly limits our ability to get out to explore the beauty more.

I have a lippy five year old who shares our household. We are working on this.

Speaking of house, our house is not our own. We are renting and would love to have our own home. Someday. Right now, it is a mess and very disorganized and makes me a little crazy at times. I emailed my Grandma on the 4th of July and said that I was glad to be invited to a friend's house to celebrate the 4th because my house was a mess. She replied, "O, there is so much difference between mess and dirt. Don't worry about the mess - soon the little mess makers are grown and gone". I wanted to reply, "Oh, Grandma, my house is messy and dirty". Still, her kind words helped. I am counting on a long, extended 'nesting' period with this pregnancy so I can get things into shape around here. We'll see . . .

I think I'm on cold/cough #6 of this pregnancy and each one seems to last 2-4 weeks. My immune system must just be wiped out with this pregnancy. I've had a nasty case of bronchitis, the stomach flu, major bladder issues and several yeast infections over the past 7 months.

I think Jedd and I have a healthy dose of anxiety about adding another member to our family and the responsibility we share.

We also share a fair amount of financial stress after my job ended in May.

My dear father-in-law has been slipping away for ten years from Alzheimer's. This is the saddest reality of our lives. He would have been a spectacular Grandpa. Even so, the girls love him so much.

Having said all this, we have a million things to be thankful for and we ask for God's help with all the rest.

6 comments:

  1. Hooray for the unvarnished truth. I certainly appreciate hearing about all parts of your lives. Much of this we can relate to and share. Looking so forward to seeing you soon.

    Mat

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  2. Ah my dear sister, what a refreshing and bare account...it is, in it's own way a beautiful telling. We miss you too. We long for days when I can come and take you kids and leave you and my bro to simply bask in uninterrupted sleep. One day we will be near again. Until then though I will continue to be jealous that you live is such a gorgeous place and thankful for my own network and community. You remind me of what has become my own certain truth, there is never just good or bad, always both and the tension of holding them with any semblance of grace.

    I love that picture of you. It makes me want to snuggle with you.

    You are my dear one.

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  3. I haven't had much time to read blogs lately, but I finally have a moment to visit and have to say how much I also appreciate hearing life's realities wrapped up in your telling. I can relate soo well to what you are experiencing now, Annika. Had to laugh about the mess versus the dirt because there's plenty of that here to go around. When will they make smart floors that suck up the dirt? or closets that you can throw everything into knowing everything will somehow make it to its intended place? Yes, this is a decade or two of life that just is the way it is and I'm thankful we have the blessing of experiencing it, dirt and all. I had to go and have another baby because the little fingerprints on the windows were starting to get too big, and I'm so glad I did.

    The picture of you is beautiful! You are a beautiful woman, mother, wife, sister, daughter, friend and cousin! and so much more...

    Thanks for sharing.

    Love you.

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  4. I read this post when you wrote it and didn't know how to respond because I'm not so good with words :-) But, I read it again today after a post from Becca and I just wanted to say thank you for being real. It is a great reminder to me that we are all connected with similar expereinces even if they are so different. Thank you for being you, Annika!

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  5. After readin your blog for awhile, I will stop lurking and post. Not the best with writing so I will use Websters words to help me:

    Significance n. real or inner meaning;
    Significant adj. important and influential/expressive
    Signify v. to have meaning

    Annika- YOU are a Significant woman in all tenses!Thanks for being revealing!

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